Day -7 contd. : Talk To Me

I still haven't gotten used to this unit yet. It's different from peds. They don't have residence or med students doing rounds here which sucks. I enjoy the company of the residents. I don't feel as important as I thought I was going to be. I highly doubt I'll make any friends on this floor. Speaking of friends, all of mine are having the times of their lives right now. I wish I could join in on some of their fun. But I'm here and there's nothing I can do about that. I spent most of the day by myself except for the occasional nurse and tech visit. A Chaplin came to see me today and she was very lively and all around great to talk to. It would be nice if I could have someone to talk everyday that would just understand. It wouldn't even have to be about cancer stuff, it could be about food, or cameras, or traveling, just anything as long as it's talking. I guess you can say I do want attention but not attention from everyone. Just one or two people who actually want to talk because they want to know more about me, more behind all this cancer crap more than just that.

I don't know, all this loneliness and isolation has me desperate for human contact. I want to know that people actually care but whatever. Everytime someone walks by the door I get excited like a little puppy does when he sees his owners.